Countdown to the Kerry/Edwards Unwind - O

During the weeks preceding the naming of his Vice Presidential running mate, Senator Kerry appeared automated, frightened and exhibited classic physical signs of a man out of control. He almost appeared depressive. He was unable to make a move without being buried under a backwash of press, public rejection and a great deal of personal, professional and military service humiliation. Women found him repulsive and hideous, men tried to relate, and found that but for his being the Democrat’s apparent choice, there was little to share in common with the man. Only a few of the brave who served in Vietnam stood with him.

However, as the winds of time changed his direction, the beautiful and witty John Edwards entered the collapsing Kerry camp, and there was an apparent visible change in Mr. Kerry’s demeanor. He became manic. Within a few short hours, John Kerry was alive again. His savior had arrived. His redeemer appeared.

The first 48 hours of public strutting were almost sensual. The touching, feeling, long gazing stares. Senator John Kerry was swept into and up by the charms of the Svengali, would be President himself, Mr. Edwards. Kerry compared their great simpatico, most notably their hair. How good it must have felt for Kerry to stroke John Edward’s thick, rich, soft and full head of hair. Under it exists the core of Mr. Edward’s mysteries. He is so loved, so admired, so sought after, and all of his own hand. Mr. Edwards did not have to resort to one single uncomfortable night in a marriage bed in order to grab his fortunes. How Senator Kerry must long to be just one little smidgen like John Edwards.

But wait. The mania cannot last forever. The pendulum mood must again swing left to the dark and desperate, secret chambers hidden within the gray matter of the gray man’s head. What will happen when Senator Edward’s awakes to find that he exists only behind the bleached toothy smile of John Edwards? Today, John Kerry is comforted to find a moment within which he might catch his breath as his newfound hero steps forward, mic in hand, to charm, enchant and engage the masses now clamoring to meet the beautiful one.

On the day that the fog lifts and John Kerry realizes that it’s all about John Edwards, the duo will be in big puo. The honeymoon will be over and the perfect marriage will be on the rocks. The body language will say it all.

In the meantime, the media must continue to ignore John Kerry completely, and increase the lauding of the great, white savior of mankind, Senator John Edwards. The media must not cover anything negative about Senator John Kerry. In fact, the media should cease all coverage of John Kerry completely.

We must all do our part to let John Edwards know that it is he we love and adore. Without John Edwards there would not even by a Presidential contest. He saved us from ourselves, from George Bush, Chaney, Rumsfield, Hillary and most importantly, he saved us from Senator John Kerry.

God bless Senator John Edwards and all that he represents to the free world.